i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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