oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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