You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
