Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
