these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I want you more than these girls want KFC
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
