...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
