No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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