It's just like the Real World with babies
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
We have started to decorate penises.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Damn victory sex feels great
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
