hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I FOUND THE LEGS
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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