Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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