It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
