bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
