I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
My hand turned me down
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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