New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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