At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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