I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
