with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
