i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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