he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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