And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
