i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
