So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
