i think my tv is drunk
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
