kristin has been a bad kristin
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
