Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Where is the hickey?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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