you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
