she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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