I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
