Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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