i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Randomize
