I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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