Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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