I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
