He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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