we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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