I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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