one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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