i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The feeling are messing with the penis
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
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