don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
