This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
