Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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