youre lurking in front of me
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
