Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Randomize
