I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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