I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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