One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
