No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
