so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
