Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
