You made me cry and you don't even care
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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